I Promise to Abuse “Red Flag” Laws to Punish My Political Opponents – You Should Too!

It’s starting to look like Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell’s unbridled zeal to take everyone’s guns away in the wake of two mass shootings was “all hat and not cattle.” The way that McConnell made it sound a week ago was as if Lindsey Graham’s federal “red flag” law and an “assault” weapons ban were all but assured, because he had talked to President Trump about them. Well… not so fast.

CNN’s Chris Cuomo… oh, wait, let me back up and provide some background first.

There is a failed TV station that’s been around for years called “CNN.” It purports to be a “news” station, even though its ratings are so catastrophically low that its programs are regularly beaten in the ratings by Dora the Explorer re-runs.

The only reason this failed TV station still exists is because Americans are forced to subsidize CNN when they buy a cable TV package. Chris Cuomo is an anchor on CNN. (Now that you know the background on this obscure, irrelevant TV station known as “CNN,” this story will make more sense.)

CNN’s Chris Cuomo had an epic public meltdown the other day that was captured on a cellphone video. He screamed and cursed in the face of a Trump supporter out in public and threatened to push the poor guy down the stairs. Cuomo has been a constant idiotic scold when it comes to President Trump for years, and not a day goes by when Cuomo does not refer to Donald Trump as a racist.

So, Trump seized upon the public meltdown of Chris Cuomo to tweet this:

“Would Chris Cuomo be given a Red Flag for his recent rant? Filthy language and a total loss of control. He shouldn’t be allowed to have any weapon. Totally nuts!”

And with that, the federal “Red Flag” law is a dead duck. Trump has illustrated that he understands the inherent dangers in a “Red Flag” law and that it’s not going to make it past his desk. Plus, hopefully it will even sink in with some of his enemies that the system is ripe for abuse.

Nobody thinks Chris Cuomo should have his guns taken away – that video simply illustrates that he’s a jerk. Trump’s point is that Cuomo could have his guns taken away, unjustly, by a “Red Flag” system being abused by his enemies. (Trump is a very stable genius, after all.)

The entire point of the “Red Flag” plan is that it will be abused. If someone doesn’t like you, they will “Red Flag” you to a judge and then with no warrant, the cops will show up to search your home and confiscate your firearms.

If the law passes, I’m totally red-flagging the house full of illegal aliens down the street from me, by the way.

Once abuse complaints about the “Red Flag” law start pouring in, the politicians will then immediately attempt to amend it by putting a “trusted overseer” in charge of the program. How about Google or Facebook? They seem trustworthy! Or, perhaps the Southern Poverty Law Center could help!

Just as we wouldn’t want any of those groups in charge of a gun control program, liberals would have to be nuts to want “Literally Hitler” to oversee it. Trump understands this and has beautifully illustrated it in a single tweet.

Then, after Trump nuked Lindsey Graham’s “Red Flag” law from orbit, Lindsey Graham turned around and destroyed the left’s hope for an “assault” weapons ban. We live in weird times!

Graham was asked the usual dumb question from reporters about why anyone would need an AR-15 for self-defense. Graham politely explained that he lives in North Carolina, which has hurricanes. If a big hurricane comes through, there’s no police, no fire, no National Guard and no help coming initially. If looters roll through Lindsey Graham’s neighborhood, they’re going to keep moving and not bother the house with the crazy Senator on the front porch with an AR-15. Proper!

That’s not a perfect answer, but I still give it a lot of points because any “assault” weapon ban would have to get through Lindsey Graham’s committee before making it to the Senate floor. Sorry, Mitch. Ain’t happenin’.